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Prayers Of Spoiled Americans

fat spoiled gluttonous slothful americans watching tv

How a spoiled nation and a dead church pray:

  • Lord, please let my favorite football team win the Superbowl.  It’s really important to me and I know how you like to bless people.
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  • Lord, please let me win the lottery, the big one, just once.  I just need to win it once and then I’ll be happy. You want me to be happy, don’t you?
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  • Lord, I need a big Christmas bonus or a raise so I can pay the mortgage and the utility bills on this big house I bought that I can’t afford to maintain.
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  • Lord, please help me to lose weight, even though I hate to diet or exercise and I love to eat candy and ice cream and other kinds of delicious junk food.
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  • Lord, please don’t let me get lung cancer, even though I like to smoke cigarettes constantly.
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  • Lord, please help me make the huge car payments on my new Mercedes.  I really like that car and I would hate to have to part with it.
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  • Lord, please help me to find a spouse who is attractive, rich, and will do anything I ask and who won’t ever complain about me being lazy or selfish.
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  • Lord, you know I like to party and get drunk so please don’t let me get into a car accident on my way home.
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  • Lord, you know how much I like sex – and after all you invented it right?  So please don’t let me get herpes, aids or some other STD or have an unwanted pregnancy, OK?
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  • Lord, please help me to pay all my credit card bills. I really need all that stuff I keep buying for myself.  It makes me feel important when I tell people about the stuff I own and you want me to feel good about myself, don’t you?
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  • Lord, please help my struggling neighbors next door.  I really would like to help them but I spent all my money on myself already and I really need to start saving up for a vacation.
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  • Lord, you know how self-centered I am, but you know I can’t help myself and I’m still basically a good person compared to all those people in jail… I never killed anybody, so when I die, you’ll let me into heaven won’t you?

Friend, Heaven is a place that you will hate unless you love holiness and hate sin.  You won’t belong there if you do not possess the righteousness of Jesus Christ.  Hell will be exactly what you are fit for, and it won’t be one big party with all your friends.  The God – whose Son Jesus Christ was crucified by people just like you – is the one who will send you to hell and He will not be sending you there to have a party.  You will be sent there to be punished for all eternity for all your many sins.  There will be weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth forever and ever.

 

“There is none righteous, no not one.” [Romans 3:10]

“For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all.” [James 2:10]

“Without holiness no man shall see the Lord” [Hebrews 12:14]