Family-Centered Training After High School

 

If men and women of antiquity could somehow be transported through time to our present era and culture, they would probably be dumbfounded by the number and kinds of choices that are granted to individuals in our society. As we have already noted, during Bible times parents exercised a decisive control in the arrangement of marriages. For the most part, a man’s choice of vocation was similarly determined. Sons usually took up the occupations of their fathers, working the land or using the tools that were passed along from one generation to another. Daughters became wives. Asking a young Israelite if he had discovered God’s will for his life’s work would probably elicit a blank stare.

 

Not so today. For young people of our time and culture, the “Big Three” among the decisions of life are marriage, vocation, and education – though not necessarily in that order. The choices are personal and the options are almost limitless (at least in theory). Given the multitude of possibilities and the importance of the decisions, the urgent search by many Christians for definitive guidance in these areas is certainly understandable… — Garry Friesen – Decision Making & the Will of God, p. 335

 

Indeed, times have changed. The question is whether they have changed for the better or for the worse. Mr. Friesen is correct in his basic assessment of the differences between the options available to a young person in “Bible times” and those available to young people today. In the Bible we see parents guiding their children all the way through their upbringing until they reach the point of marriage and vocation. Today parents take an essentially hands-off approach once the child finishes high school. His (or her) choices educationally, vocationally, and when it comes to selecting a mate are essentially up to the young person alone.

 

Notice right off one of the key issues in this matter of how our post-high-school children go about determining the direction of their lives. Mr. Friesen wrote of how a young person in Bible times would be “dumbfounded by the number and kinds of choices that are granted to individuals in our society” (emphasis added). Here is the essence of the matter. Today we view life direction as a matter of individual choice, whereas in the Bible it was a matter of family and even community concern. Again, our author observed, “The choices are personal and the options are almost limitless” (emphasis added). Precisely. The choices open to a young person today are regarded as choices he can and must make himself. His life direction is personal decision.

 

In contrast, in Bible times the decision would have been his, but it would have been heavily guided by his father and mother. The focus would not be his personal desires alone or even primarily. His choices would be substantially shaped by the will of his father, the good of his family, and how he fit into the local community. For a young woman, her life direction would have been even more thoroughly dictated by family considerations.

 

Those of us who homeschool our children have come to understand the substantial measure of responsibility we have for their total upbringing and the great degree to which we can and must be involved in their lives. As we saw in our last issue (“Home Education Is Biblical Education”) parents are at the center of the process of training; they are the God-appointed teachers of their children. And the process of training is not some merely cognitive, classroom-oriented process. It is a process of discipleship: an intimate, constant relationship in which the parent shapes the child’s heart as well as his mind.

 

The question is: When does this responsibility end? It seems that most parents would consider the process complete once the child has completed “high school” level academic work. It is at that point that even homeschooling parents tend to regard the young person as ready to go out and make his own decision about education, vocation, and marriage, with a minimum of input from the parents. We have argued elsewhere, however, that the process of training is not complete just because the child has passed an artificial academic/cultural milestone (cf. our article, “A Father’s Job Description,” in issue 16, and John Thompson’s article, “College at Home to the Glory of God,” in issue 14). Parents are responsible to train their children to be competent husbands/fathers or wives/mothers and to be competent in a vocation; and parents have the responsibility to guide their older children into a life’s work and into a godly marriage.

 

One of the tragedies we see in the homeschooling subculture is that the fruit of many years of devoted training is being squandered as parents essentially abandon their children to make their “personal” decisions as “individuals” when it comes to the most important choices in life: further education and training, vocation, and marriage. It is precisely at this point that parental involvement and direction is most crucial and that the years of intimate parent/child discipleship could bear the most enduring fruit. Instead, children are sent off to find their own way in life.

 

What is the problem here? It boils down to this: Even homeschooling parents fail to grasp the larger vision of a properly family-centered approach to life. We have bought into the worldview that accentuates the individual and minimizes family ties (or any other communal ties). And so once we are finished training through “high school” we think our work is done: we have prepared another individual to take his or her place in society, on terms they are free to consider without respect to family, community, local church, or any other ties that might hinder the liberty of the individual to create his or her own destiny.

 

So we send our children off to college, assuming that academic preparation is most important, and ignoring the moral and spiritual dangers of this approach. We urge our children to move out of the house, get their own apartments and a job to support themselves, and we forget their need for continued guidance and preparation for their life work and for marriage.

 

What exactly is wrong with the standard send-them-away approach to our post-high-school children? And what would be a better approach? Let us consider several issues.

 

LIFE VISION

 

The most important role our children will fill in life is that of a godly husband and father or wife and mother. It is through this calling that they will do more to advance the kingdom of God in this world than in any other calling. It is in carrying out this calling that they will spend more time and energy than in any other facet of their lives, be they male or female. We must raise our children with the expectation that their preparation for their future family responsibilities is the most important dimension of their life preparation. In short, above all else we must communicate the vision that creating their own godly households will be life’s greatest adventure.

 

The present-day approach communicates none of this vision. Instead young people are given the impression that home and family are for kids and that as newly-arrived adults they must set out on an adventure away from the confines of the home.

 

Consider the pervasive mission trip craze. (How many appeals for funding have you received this past year?) Though obviously not wrong as such, they tend to feed the notion that the serious work for God is somehow far way and exotic. Helping haul bricks to build an orphanage in India, or “witnessing” on the streets of Mexico City for two weeks is seen as the purest form of the spiritual quest. What an adventure! Pity the poor kid who has to stay home and merely can applesauce or help run the family business. But in fact, the latter are engaging in preparation far better suited to the real life God has called them to live for the rest of their lives.

 

We hesitate to mention in this connection the popular “apprenticeship” programs offered by a popular, national ministry that also offers a homeschooling program through high school. Here children leave home for months at a time to work with other children their age in training and missions programs. Even while the ministry itself emphasizes family renewal, their method undermines that very emphasis. Young people are subtly taught that real life preparation (at least after high school) cannot occur in the confines of the home and family, nor under the tutelage of parents. To receive the very best training possible, it seems, you have to leave parents, home, and local church and be part of a giant ministry effort. While no doubt fulfilling and useful to the young person in many ways, the effect is to train children away from their home-centered calling.

 

Needless to say, sending children off to college assures that their hearts will be turned away from home and family and reoriented toward the pursuit of the all-important “career.” What college student has foremost in his (or her) mind that he is preparing to be a family leader, a godly spouse, a parent to children, and that from this base will spring his greatest effectiveness in every other area of life? None that I know.

 

Why can’t we give young people a vision that fits more closely with a biblical view of what their primary life calling is to be? We can, but it will involve re-thinking the standard cultural models for training after high school. Our greatest challenge today is to learn how to help our children see a family-centered life as the real adventure.

 

EXPECTATIONS

 

Closely related to the issue of the vision we give our children as they near adulthood is that of the expectations that we create through the methods we use in their preparation. We have already alluded to the subtle expectations created by college, mission trips, and distant, institutional apprenticeships. These experiences tend to communicate this way: Where will you find fulfillment and purpose in life? Not in the mundane callings of husband and wife, not in the mere drudgery of fatherhood and motherhood. Not within the confines of the home. No, your real fulfillment will be in something “bigger,” a mission, a career that is by definition related to the world beyond the home.

 

These expectations bode ill for the future of the young people who have them. They come to view family life as confining and unfulfilling. They are set up to be dissatisfied with the ordinary responsibilities of fatherhood and motherhood. Or if they maintain a positive view of these callings, they are tempted to believe that being a father or mother is a snap. After all, it doesn’t require any special preparation. Career is what is demanding. Parenthood (and spousehood) just happens, somehow. This too will lead to problems once the reality of family life is encountered.

 

It is the young women who are especially injured by the method of being sent away from the home for their life preparation. While their God-given calling is a home-centered one (Titus 2; Proverbs 31) and their life mission is to be the helper of a man as he pursues his dominion calling (Genesis 2), the experience of being trained outside the home tempts them to dissatisfaction with their role. What college offers a degree in motherhood? No, the young women are invited to prepare for careers just like the men, and they develop the expectation that fulfillment will be found not in home-centered work, but in finding a niche in the marketplace. This sets up inevitable tensions once these women are married.

 

The issues here are serious. In Titus 2:5 Paul urges young women to be workers at home “that the word of God may not be blasphemed.” Yet our whole method of training our daughters is one that tempts them to blaspheme the word of God by becoming discontent with the calling God has given them as they prepare for their own careers outside the home.

 

Even if we keep the priority of being a wife and mother before the girls and don’t allow them to prepare for a career outside the home, we may lead them astray. The very act of sending a daughter away on a mission trip for a couple weeks or on an apprenticeship for several months teaches her to have a spirit of independence that will not suit her for her calling as a helper to her husband. Nowhere in Scripture do you see a model that allows for daughters to leave their fathers’ authority and protection prior to marriage, yet that is the norm even in Christian circles today. By training our daughters to be independent we may be training them to blaspheme the word of God.

 

After spending some time in Russia as part of a mission team, a girl wrote others of her experience. One statement caught the attention of my oldest daughter (who does a lot of home-centered work and has never been to Russia). The girl wrote: “When I left Russia, I left part of my heart there.” What struck both my daughter and me was this: Why is this young lady being put in a position where she is developing affections for a work that is neither her father’s nor her husband’s? How is she being trained for the life that God is actually calling her to as a woman? In fact, despite the worthy nature of the work itself, she is nevertheless subtly being trained to be independent, to develop her own sense of direction and priorities in life. We’re not saying her life is ruined. We’re just trying to call attention to the ways we thoughtlessly disregard biblical priorities as we fit in with the culture’s methods of training our children. We create expectations that cannot be fulfilled within the bounds of a biblical life calling.

 

FAMILY BONDS

 

A father’s job is not done until he has led his children into a God-honoring vocation and a godly marriage. Parents were given this task, the total life-preparation of their children, yet the task is more often than not abandoned short of the goal. This is the tragedy of the modern method of handling older children: it short-circuits the parental role in the training of children and thereby hinders the continuity of the parent-child bond that is essential to the progress of the gospel in the world.

 

In Malachi 4:6 and Luke 1:17 we have a double witness given as to the importance of the fathers’ hearts being turned to their children and the children’s hearts being turned toward their fathers. We have previously discussed the meaning of this “turning of the hearts” (“The Father’s Heart: God’s #1 Priority,” issue 22). In short, it refers to the necessity of godly training in the context of a loving relationship. If we may quote a relevant portion from that article:

 

… Each generation may not have the opportunity to witness the crossing of the Red Sea or the Jordan River on dry ground, but each generation has the opportunity to experience the living God in a way that will preserve their faith. As fathers open their hearts, love and train their children, walk with God openly before their families, urge their children to follow the Lord with them – then the children come to experience the God of their fathers, not as memory and story only, but as living reality in their own lives. The parent-child heart channel becomes the means for each generation to have an encounter with God that assures their continuance in the faith.

 

As children come to walk with God as they walk with their parents, they will create their own history of divine encounters. Sin confessed, God’s discipline received, forgiveness experienced, prayers answered, guidance gained from Scripture – all these create a personal history of God’s dealing with the child that assure the genuineness, depth, and perseverance of his faith. The faith of the fathers becomes the faith of the next generation… and so on.

 

What a shame when this process is cut short just at the most crucial time in the child’s life: the time in which he is making the most important decisions in life, those related to vocation and marriage. Here is where all previous training can come to fruition. Here is where the parent-child bond can be cemented for life, in a way that will assure strong family ties for generations to come and thus create the most productive channels available for the progress of God’s kingdom.

 

The family in the West is in the weakest state that institution has been in since perhaps declining Rome. This is due to the sense of the increasing irrelevance of the family in our individualistic society in which so many family functions have been swallowed up by government or eliminated through technology. But it is also due to the simultaneous and related deterioration of family bonds, the relationships between family members within and between the generations.

 

One way to begin to restore these bonds is for parents to reclaim the total process of child-raising, including that of establishing them in vocation and family, and in that process to win the hearts of their children to a family-centered vision of life.

 

Let’s not just teach our children that preparing for starting their own families is their most important calling, let’s also teach them to view that new family in the context of the extended family. Psalm 112: 1,2 says, “Blessed is the man who fears the LORD, Who delights greatly in His commandments. His descendents will be mighty on earth…”. How many men can say that his descendants are mighty in the earth? Perhaps part of the reason is that his descendants are scattered over the earth with no sense of connection or obligation to the rest of their extended family. Like coals scattered in the fire, they lose their effectiveness. If families would regain a sense of common purpose, shared commitments, ties of love that bind, then perhaps we would see more men who are mighty in the land, and the flame of family strength would be rekindled. Perhaps then a vision of ministry and dominion could be passed on from generation to generation. Perhaps then extended family would choose to remain close together to increase their strength and enhance their mutual support. Perhaps then the local church would be strengthened with a continuity of membership rather than being decimated by the nomadic lifestyle of modern families.

 

We need to consider returning to methods of training our children that will bring a restoration of the extended family living within a community and within a local church. We must, that is, if we care about maximizing our effectiveness for the gospel in the world. Our current methods ignore the essential heart bonds between the generations and the ties God intended to bind members of the larger family to one another. Homeschooling is a start to reversing that trend, but we must carry its implications further. We must communicate a total family-centered vision of life. (See “Is It Right to Be Family-Centered?” in issue 24 for a discussion of how being properly family-centered is the most effective way to be outward-oriented and pursue our task of dominion in the world.)

 

DAVID AND JESUS

 

The scriptures everywhere presuppose the model of family life we are portraying here. But it may be useful to consider a couple of examples that display the wisdom of a family-centered approach to raising children into adulthood.

 

First is David, the one we remember as King of Israel, a military hero, a musician and poet. But let’s remember how he got his start. He did not enroll in Saul’s school for training future leaders (if he had such a school). He did not enlist in the military academy to learn the art of war. He did not attend the Jerusalem Conservatory of Music to acquire his skill on the harp. His training was all at home.

 

He learned the art of shepherding people by shepherding sheep. It was there that he also learned courage, strategy, and prowess as he defended the animals from the lion and the bear. And it was also in the home and in the field that he learned to play his instruments to the glory of God. This simple, home-trained boy was the man God chose to become the greatest king Israel ever had and the one who would be a type of Messiah the King.

 

He was known simply as “the son of Jesse” (1 Samuel 16:18). Notice the emphasis on this point after David had killed Goliath (17:55-58):

 

When Saul saw David going out against the Philistine, he said to Abner, the commander of the army, “Abner, whose son is this youth?”

     And Abner said, “As your soul lives, O king, I do not know.”

So the king said, “Inquire whose son this young man is.”

     Then, as David returned from the slaughter of the Philistine, Abner took him and brought him before Saul with the head of the Philistine in his hand. And Saul said to him, “Whose son are you, young man?”

So David answered, “I am the son of your servant Jesse the Bethlehemite.”

 

The definition of David was that he was his father’s son. He received his training from his father, and it was his father who received the credit for his accomplishments. The home was a more than adequate training ground for one of the greatest and most accomplished men of the Bible. And it was his relationship with his father that was stressed, not any credentials achieved outside the family.

 

This is an illustration of the fact that our usefulness to God is tied to how well we perform in the family setting. The home is the training ground for all of life, and a life centered on the home is one that God can use beyond the home. Effective families become effective far beyond their own narrow scope, but effectiveness in the family is the starting point for effectiveness in any other sphere of life.

 

How many of us, or of our children, would be identified by others as “the son of . . .” Yet this is the kind of intergenerational tie that marks real world-changers.

 

Jesus is the other example we have in mind in this connection. On the human level, of course, Jesus was known as “the carpenter’s son” (Matthew 13:55). His status in life was derived from his father whose occupation he took up. Even though He was the Messiah, with a much larger mission in life than being a carpenter, he still submitted to the convention of being trained by his father and carrying on his work. He was known as His father’s son because His father has trained Him.

 

Yet Jesus also showed the same regard for His heavenly Father. “Jesus answered and said to them, ‘Most assuredly, I say to you, the Son can do nothing of Himself, but what He sees the Father do; for whatever He does, the Son also does in like manner. For the Father loves the Son, and shows Him all thing that He Himself does….'” Jesus’ references to His Father are constant in the book of John. No less than 100 times He refers to His Father’s will, word, and works and the relationship that exists between them. Though He was Himself God the Son, He looked to His Father to receive His mission in life and deferred to Him constantly.

 

Fathers today need to learn from David and Jesus. They need to see it as their calling to carry the training of their children through to completion, to the very shaping of their life’s work. God may have a mission for your children that is greater than you can imagine, but it will be a mission that you prepare them for as you prepare them for a normal life of work and service. And the bonds that are created between you and your children as you do that will not only reflect honor back on you as they move out and accomplish things for God in this life, they will also help assure that the process will be repeated in the next generation and that your descendants will indeed become mighty in the land, to the glory of God.

 

HOW I’M APPLYING ALL THIS

 

Allow me to conclude by becoming personal and sharing how I am attempting to implement all these ideas in my own family. You can rest assured that I fall far short in many ways, and things always sound better on paper than they look in reality. But here’s a glimpse anyway.

 

I have six children (20, 18, 16, 14, 12, 6). All have been homeschooled from the beginning. We consider it sin to send children to public school, and we don’t find most Christian schools much better. Our plan has always been to balance academic training with spiritual growth, equipping in life skills, and an emphasis on creativity in all things.

 

We have taught our children to expect our guidance beyond the high school level, extending to the time they are married. They expect my wife, Pam, and I to help them in the process of finding a mate. The girls know that I will take the initiative in investigating young men and presenting one to them who I consider a good candidate for marriage. The boys know that I will likewise take an active role in guiding them toward a wife, though in their case it is appropriate for them to take initiative and deal directly with the father of a prospective young woman.

 

I have sought to expose my sons to as much and various work as I could over the years, and living in a rural area the last five years has greatly enhanced my ability to do that, since it seems there is more work that a boy can do out here. While I want each son to pursue academic training as far as his ability and interest dictates, I am even more concerned that each one learn some trade skills which he can use to earn a living and care for his own family in the future. Part of my working assumption has been that we are entering a period of history in which self-sufficiency skills will be more valuable than very specialized skills that will only equip a man for a narrow niche in the division of labor. I want to shape well-rounded men who can do a lot well and take care of themselves and their families no matter what happens to our society.

 

My oldest son Drew (almost 19) works building houses and is setting up his own house so that he is ready to live on his own in anticipation of taking a wife when the Lord provides one. He takes charge of much of the work on the homestead, including care for the animals. I keep my younger son Seth (almost 14) busy with work around the homestead, the house we are remodeling, and helping other families in the church when they need an extra pair of hands.

The family-centered vision has been passed along to the boys. As early as 15 Drew was talking of his desire

to finish his academic training so he could work, set up a home, get married, and have many godly children and grandchildren. (I don’t think I had that vision at 15!)

 

The girls are busy at home, practicing the life skills they will need in the future as they bless my family now with their labors. My oldest daughter Sarah (with a little help) has canned nearly 1,000 jars of food this year. The girls planted most of the vegetable garden and provided most of the care. They help me out in my ministry work, entering data, sending out mail orders, making tapes. Later they will help their husbands in similar ways.

 

All the girls have “hope chests” (whether or not it is a chest) in which they are setting aside things they can use when they are married and have a family. This is a constant focus for them all, even now for six-year-old Alice. It is a form of dowry that I can offer a prospective husband along with my daughter. And it will be substantial. When we moved last December Sarah alone had nearly 60 boxes of her own things that we had to move, most of it hope chest things! It has grown since, and she has virtually everything she would need to set up house, from dishes and kitchenware, to linens, to home decorations. (I don’t know what people could give as wedding gifts.)

 

None of my children has been to college or, at this point, expects to go. If they were to require college-level training, I would arrange a college-at-home program to spare them the unwholesome influence of campus life, and to keep them in touch with the real world of family, church, work, and community.

 

I would not send a daughter away for any kind of academic training since her training is supposed to be home-centered in any case, and since I could not exercise my duty of oversight and protection if she were out of the home. When my oldest daughter was 17 I did send her to another state to serve a Christian family who had health needs and a lot of children. I saw that experience as consistent with the calling she was being trained for, and I made sure she was under the authority of a godly man and part of a good church during the six weeks away; plus I kept regular contact with her by phone. I could imagine doing something similar for a brief time of training in something like midwifery or another skill related to her calling.

 

Sending a daughter to college, in my view, would be to tempt her to abandon the calling God has given her and to invite her to develop a spirit of independence. It would also weaken the influence that my wife and I could exert and would likely lead to the fracturing of our family as she would likely marry someone of her own choosing and move somewhere else.

 

All my children are being trained to expect to remain close to the rest of the family, unless God somehow clearly calls them to another location (and finding a godly man for the daughters could well require that). The norm is to remain with family, to build ties between siblings, cousins, etc., and between the generations of the extended family. We will seek to invite the prospective husbands for my daughters to become part of our community here.

 

They are being taught to expect to be part of the local church through the years and to raise their children and grandchildren in the same church. We also teach that Christian community (Christians being neighbors) is not just a neat idea but essential to the survival of Christian faith over the generations. (Steve Schlissel suggested that one practical thing that can move us in the direction of creating Christian communities is for each family to simply decide that they will never move again unless they can move next door to another Christian family.)

 

They are being taught to expect to care for their elderly parents if that need should arise (another reason to remain in the same general location). If a daughter’s husband should die, she would have her father and brothers close by to help out (not to mention the men of the church).

 

Back to our original issue: we reject the notion that it is normal to send children away just at the time that they are ready to make the most important decisions in life. We believe it is a lie that they need distance from their parents or the training of some distant “experts” to be adequately prepared for life. Their best training is in the context of the home, church, and community. This is real life. This is the basis for real strength over the years.

 

We will not see our family scattered and its strength dissipated by following the idolatry of individual self-determination. We will make our decisions based on what is good for the whole family, for the local church, and for the Christian community. We will plan to maintain our place in each one unless God clearly calls us elsewhere.

We think the home is more than a place you grow up in and family is more than the people you see each Christmas. We intend to see the family resurrected, by God’s grace, so that we can once again have families of whom it could be said that they are mighty in the land. If that’s ever going to happen it means we have to make choices that will make it possible.

 

No matter where you are in this process yourself, you can begin where you are. Just make each new choice in light of the standard of values you want for your family. That’s how new directions are set. Your little choices today can change the world tomorrow.

 

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College at Home, for the Glory of God

by John Thompson

 

As habitual as birds heading south for the winter, a new brood of students takes wing each fall to college campuses around the world. Clearly, this seasonal migration is healthful for birds. But is the flocking of students to college campuses likewise wholesome? Is this recurrent pilgrimage the result of careful reasoning or cultural influences? Before sending our children to flight, our family decided to more thoroughly investigate the campus charisma.

 

This was two years ago. Zoie, our oldest of three daughters and an aspiring student of music, was beginning her last year of high school. Ten years of home education had raised (and answered) the many well-worn questions about curriculum types, learning styles, father’s involvement, relating to the State, relating to the church, preference vs. conviction, peer-group problems and various others. But now we faced a whole batch of new questions:

 

(1) What precisely is God’s purpose for our children’s higher education?

(2) Does a father’s home-education responsibility extend to fully preparing his children for adulthood, marriage and establishing a new household?

(3) What specific disciplines (in academics, fine arts, life skills and spiritual development) are necessary for “entering adulthood?”

(4) How are these disciplines different for young women vs. young men?

(5) What role does a young person’s God-given gifts, talents and interests play?

(6) How might these disciplines be developed during the post-high school years? (home business, apprenticeship, trade/technical school, college programs—under what circumstances?) And most importantly,

(7) How do our home-schooling convictions apply to post-high school training?

 

At some point in our home-schooling adventure, we fathers must deal honestly and faithfully with these seven crucial questions. Otherwise, we will fail to complete (or may even seriously undermine) the child training that God has entrusted to us, resulting in spiritually aborted children. Sadly, I had seen this happen to home-schooled students across the country, graduating from high school and then just floundering at a menial job or being sent away to a compromising setting (usually college). The fruit of hard parental labor was devoured by the locust of humanistic values, never to yield a truly bountiful harvest for the Lord.

 

Determined that our children would not become just another statistic of spiritual mediocrity, our family set about the task of resolving the hard questions that now confronted us. Here is “our story.” It may not answer all your questions, but is intended at least to introduce you to a model for post-secondary education that we hope you will, like the noble-minded Bereans, “examine by the Scriptures to see whether these things are so” (Acts 17:11).

During her last year of high school, Zoie and I spent much time together in study and discussion about her future education, deliberating over these seven determinative questions. Since “the fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge,” our investigation from start to finish was guided by the principles of God’s Word. We knew that if God’s revealed will in Scripture were compromised, His glory through her life would ultimately be diminished. No education program was worth that! Hence, we agreed that any option requiring conformity to the world rather than to Christ simply was not His will. Thus, our journey had begun on solid footing with a common commitment to God’s truth.

 

God’s Purpose For Our Children’s Higher Education

 

Our course would largely be charted by the answer to our first and most pivotal question, What precisely is God’s purpose for our children’s higher education? Or, to broach the issue a little more generally, what is man’s ultimate purpose according to the Bible? Surely it is NOT simply to improve himself (“be all that you can be”) nor even to serve mankind (“do good works”), though these are unquestionably proper byproducts. Rather, man’s ultimate purpose is to bring glory to God in all that we do (1 Cor. 10:31).

 

Shouldn’t the schooling of our children, therefore, have this goal as its principal test? Certainly! What, then, glorifies God in educating our children? Scripturally, it is when their education prepares them to achieve their God-ordained responsibilities in this world, which are (in order of priority):

 

(1) to be properly related to God through salvation and spiritual growth (Matt. 6:33; 22:37);

(2) to be accomplished and devoted in their role responsibilities as a husband/father or wife/mother (Eph. 5:22-25; Gen. 2:18; Tit. 2:4; 1 Tim. 2:15);

(3) to be a dedicated, active member of a local body of believers (Eph. 4:12; Gal. 6:10); and

(4) to bring dominion over the creation (not independently but with their mate) by developing their God-given abilities (Gen. 1:28).

 

These four life functions define our responsibilities to God, family, church and world. Anything which detracts from glorifying God through these four general responsibilities can have no place in our children’s education. Anything? Yes, that is the plain meaning of 1 Cor. 10:31: “Whatever (anything) you do, do all to the glory of God.” Immediately we could see that anything secular in Zoie’s future education would need to be very carefully scrutinized. Secular education by definition does not intend to relate our children properly to God or help them to grow into the image of Christ. Instead, its stated aim is to glorify man through evolution, self-authority, situation ethics and “global citizenship.” Even worse, it is often purposely designed to destroy our children’s faith in God.

Unfortunately, however, even most Christian education today works at cross-purposes with God’s blueprint for our children. By training young men and women for self-satisfying careers that are independent of their mates or families, Christian schools (though perhaps unintentionally) mimic the world’s disdain for the values of marriage, fatherhood and motherhood. Something is desperately wrong when a young person can graduate from a Christian college—even a Bible college—and view their role as a husband/father or wife/ mother as secondary to some self-pleasing profession, whereas God places those esteemed roles second only to our walk with Him.

Already it appeared to us that Zoie’s higher education would not follow any traditional path. But, then, home schoolers should be accustomed to pioneering new trails. That is simply our calling as “aliens and strangers” in a foreign land (1 Pet. 2:11).

 

The Extent Of A Father’s Educational Responsibility

 

But who was I to direct my daughter’s higher education? After all, she was of age now, wasn’t she? At age 18 wasn’t she automatically an “adult” and responsible to make her own educational decisions? These were the kinds of questions leveled at us by well-meaning family members and educational acquaintances, Christian and non-Christian alike. They echoed the anti-family, individualistic philosophy of humanism that has infected even the church today.

 

Thus, our family embarked upon answering our second decisive question, Does a father’s home-education responsibility extend to fully preparing his children for adulthood, marriage and establishing a new household? Here, really, was a question of the breadth and depth of our home schooling. To what extent in age and subject matter is a father responsible for his children’s education?

 

It may come as a surprise—even to some home-schooling parents—to think that the father has much of a role at all in the education of his children. Isn’t Dad just the “provider and protector” of the home, leaving Mom to school the kids while he slugs it out in the workplace? This common picture is fatally flawed! Indeed, every (yes, EVERY) child-training command in Scripture is directed NOT to mothers but to fathers (e.g., Ps. 78:1-8; Eph. 6:4). The mother’s role is to assist (not replace) the father as his God-appointed helper (Gen. 2:18). Dads are personally responsible before God not merely to oversee their children’s education but also to participate in their training through daily hands-on involvement. Thus, the Bible throughout pictures the father himself frequently with his children, teaching them both formally and informally (Deut. 6:1-9; 2 Ki. 4:17-18; Prov. 1-9). And, much more than just daily devotions, the content of the father’s instruction, according to Psalm 78:1-8, encompasses both God’s Word and God’s works—including math, science, language arts, history and all other subjects of God’s creation. When the father is legitimately unavailable due to other Scriptural responsibilities, the Bible pictures the mother as his primary assistant for the child-education task (Prov. 1:8; 6:20; 31:1). And when truly necessary, the father may delegate some (not all) instruction to a private tutor who will stand in loco parentis (in place of the parent) by imparting the father’s biblical values and submitting to the father’s will (1 Chron. 27:32).

 

Now, if a stranger were to peer into your window and conclude that the mother is the primary child trainer and the father is her helper, then something is drastically wrong in your home. That is NOT the biblical norm. Regrettably, America’s home-schooling movement is led almost entirely by women, both in the homes and in the local and state organizations. This is God’s rebuke to the men in our generation for their sinful withdrawal from leadership, much as was the case in Israel when Deborah was judge (cf. Jud. 4; Isa. 3:12). It is time for home-schooling fathers to repent of their halfhearted efforts and truly turn their hearts back to their children (Luke 1:17), “that they should put their confidence in God, and not forget the works of God, but keep His commandments, and not be like their fathers, a stubborn and rebellious generation, a generation that did not prepare its heart, and whose spirit was not faithful to God” (Ps. 78:7-8).

 

Plainly, then, a father has the foremost role in home schooling. But, as we asked before, to what extent in age and subject matter is he responsible to teach his children? The extent of “school” is commonly considered to be kindergarten through high school and the subject matter to be “academics” plus a smattering of fine arts. Yet isn’t the scope of a father’s duty to train his children from birth until adulthood in all disciplines necessary for maturity? The Greek (secular) model of child education, as it is practiced in our modern culture and has influenced us all, wrongly assumes that a father’s training of his children is completed when they reach age 18 and complete certain high school academic requirements. He then “graduates” his children from high school and sends them out of the family home to a college or job. They are released from parental oversight, often to godless supervisors and circumstances, with little further opportunity for spiritual or practical discipleship by the father.

 

The Hebrew (biblical) model of child education considers our children to be “youth” from age 13 until about age 20 (a norm, not a legalistic framework), and charges the father with a much broader scope of child training until the youth is fully prepared for adulthood, marriage and establishing a new household. Indeed, that was the scope of the Torah (the Law of Moses), the Hebrew father’s primary curriculum for child training. It was a veritable “manual for life” to which every facet of life was related. Not only did the Torah teach one about his relationship to God, but also his relationship to his neighbor, family, spouse, community, government, enemies and, indeed, all of society as well as the physical creation. Being not only revelatory of God but also regulatory of the nation, the Torah guided the whole life of the Jew: his house, dress, food, employment, domestic arrangements, distribution of property, politics, and civil and religious life.

 

How much more extensive and expansive the biblical vision of child training is! And Jewish fathers (Old Testament believers) assumed this broad responsibility enthusiastically. Indeed, they considered it an honor; and everything else gave way to this most important part of their lives. Modern home-schooling dads must restore the biblical “depth and breadth” of their educational responsibility.

 

Disciplines Necessary For Release To Adulthood

 

If traditional “high school graduation” is not the biblical measure of maturity, then what specific disciplines are necessary for a young person’s release? What subject matter will fully prepare our children for adulthood, marriage and establishing a new household?

 

This third of our seven vital questions led not only our family but also our whole church toward a new completion point for home schooling which we call Life Graduation. After fulfilling her high school requirements, Zoie enjoyed a family-centered celebration similar to a birthday party and received a high school diploma primarily as a “passport” into college level studies. But her sights were now upon a much more comprehensive target—the full range of disciplines necessary for adult maturity, which seem to fall into four basic categories: academics, fine arts, life skills and spiritual maturity.

 

Academics, rather than being an end in itself, is to be pursued for the purpose of understanding God’s creation and undergirding training in the other three fundamental categories. Fine arts enable our children to appreciate the beauty of God’s creation whereas life skills (applied arts) equip them to exercise the utility of God’s creation. Both aspects of God’s creation—its beauty as well as its utility—comprise God’s “dominion mandate” (Gen. 1:28) which we fathers are obliged to train our children to fulfill. Finally, our children’s spiritual maturity purposes to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.

 

Life Graduation signifies that a young man or young woman is entering full adulthood and, though no partner may yet be in waiting, is sufficiently prepared for the covenant of marriage and the establishing of a new household (Gen. 2:24). This is the climax toward which all child training since birth should be culminating. This—not some secular substitute—is the focus of our educational vision. And, since the whole local church is involved in equipping parents (Eph. 4:12), this is the event for which the entire assembly should joyfully gather to honor the new graduate and to give praise together to God! This now became our family’s new destination for our educational journey. We looked forward to the day our daughters’ would attain the noble goal of being a “Proverbs 31 Woman.”

 

Education Of Young Women Vs. Young Men

 

As our family wondered how to arrive at that new destination we were prompted to address the fourth essential question, How is the education of young women different from that of young men? Even to pose such a question in our egalitarian, post-Christian culture, is to invite ridicule and ostracism by the educational establishment where traditional male and female distinctions are despised. Yet, if the God-ordained role of a woman is different from that of a man, then it follows that her preparation for that role will be different, at least in its content and perhaps in its instructional location as well.

 

Already we had concluded from our first question that God is glorified in our children’s schooling only when it prepares them to achieve their four God-ordained responsibilities (God, family, church and world). But does God distinguish those life functions by gender? And, if so, how? Clearly, there is no gender distinction in our first responsibility of being properly related to God through salvation and spiritual growth. “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free man, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus” (Gal. 3:28).

 

But in each of the other three life functions, God plainly differentiates the woman’s role from the man’s. A young man’s education, therefore, must prepare him (in this order of priority) to be a selfless husband and father, a servant-leader in the local church, and a ruler over the social and physical spheres of God’s creation in a way that involves his wife as his assistant. However, a young woman’s training must equip her (again, in this order of priority) to be a devoted wife and mother, a servant-contributor in the local church, and a helper to her husband in bringing dominion over God’s creation—that is, assisting her husband rather than having a separate ministry or occupation.

 

Precisely how do these gender-specific life functions influence the content of our children’s education, and perhaps their instructional location, too? Since God gave us a family of all girls, the young woman’s training was our foremost concern. In examining the four disciplines necessary for adult maturity, we saw only minor gender-related differences in the teaching of academics or fine arts to our children. Yes, since academics comprise the support structure for the other three disciplines, there would be some small variation for young women. Still, a woman must have sufficient academic ability to aid her husband in schooling their children to the point of full adulthood. And whereas “keeping house” (1 Tim. 5:14) is part of the woman’s role, her training in fine arts may include some applications different from that of a young man (such as flower arranging, stenciling, interior decoration). Nevertheless, the study of fine arts itself (music, art, literature, architecture, landscaping, etc.) is definitely as important for young men as it is for young women if we are equally to appreciate the beauty of God’s creation as He intends.

 

It was in the other two disciplines—the life skills and spiritual development—that we found substantial, gender-related differences which would affect the content of our daughters’ education. Since the role of ninety-nine percent of young women is to be a devoted wife and mother (i.e., not remain single, Gen. 1:28), her training in life skills must prepare her to be a capable helper to her husband, trainer of her children and caretaker of her home (Gen. 2:18; Prov. 1:8; Tit. 2:5). Such skills would certainly include all that is involved in the spheres of cooking, sewing, home care, child care, health care, animal care, gardening, and domestic finances.

Further, if a young woman’s spiritual role is to be a servant-contributor, the content of her training must equip her to be a submissive helper in the home as well as in the assembly, freeing up the men to exercise their God-appointed leadership (1 Tim. 2:8-15). Training of this sort might include a major ministry to mothers in the church (on Sundays and weekdays too) as well as helping with the church nursery, fellowship meals, home Bible study hostess, music ministry, hospitality, family evangelism, missions helper, visitation of shut-ins, etc.—all under parental supervision, of course.

 

In summary, a young woman’s training should be modeled after the examples of Sarah, Mary and the virtuous wife of Proverbs 31, whose lives centered around their husband, children and homeworking (cf. 1 Tim. 2:15). A Christian woman’s God-ordained “career” is not just in her home—it is her home (i.e., her husband and her children)!

 

Where is this training to occur? At some distant school, camp or other educational setting? Decidedly not! The fundamental tenet that distinguishes Christian home education from Christian school education is our belief that the parents are a child’s God-appointed teachers (Ps. 78:1-8; Prov. 6:20) and that the family home (and its environs) is the God-ordained classroom—”when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way” (Deut. 6:7; 1 Cor. 15:33).

 

Then when do older children finally leave the family home? For young women, it seems, the Scriptural time for departure is at marriage, and not before (1 Cor. 7:36-38). Because God created the woman to be the “weaker vessel” (more vulnerable, 1 Pet. 3:7; 1 Tim. 2:14), He intends for her never to be out from under the protective covering of either a father or a husband (1 Sam. 30:18). She is to abide in the protective shadow of her father (Ps. 36:7) until she moves into the shadow of her husband (S.of S. 2:3). This is the clear implication of Numbers 30 which sets forth only three Scriptural marital states for women: a single woman in her father’s house (normally in her youth), a married woman in her husband’s house, and a divorced or widowed woman who is under the direct protection of God (Ps. 68:5) and the care of church elders (1 Tim. 5:3ff). There is no biblical marital status (and no normative Scriptural example) of a single woman who leaves her father’s home for reasons other than marriage. Obviously, such a conclusion from Scripture had a significant impact on where we would train our daughters and where they would reside before marriage.

 

What about the education of a young man? How is the content and location of his education unique to his gender? Since the vast majority of young men are intended by God first and foremost to become selfless husbands and fathers, his training in life skills must prepare him to be a bold but loving leader in his home, a skillful discipler of his children and an adequate provider for his household. To be fully prepared for adulthood, marriage and establishing a new household, a young man must demonstrate Christlike character, sufficient knowledge to teach his children, and stable employment (preferably a home business) that will support a family (Prov. 24:27; 1 Tim. 5:8). In addition to “income producing skills,” he ought also to have “income preserving skills” such as home building (carpentry, electrical, plumbing, painting, masonry), landscaping and lawn care, auto mechanics, vegetable gardening, animal care, business administration and computer skills. And since a young man’s spiritual role is to be a servant-leader, his training must involve leadership in worship (1 Cor. 14:26), prayer (1 Tim. 2:8), doctrine (1 Cor. 14:35), self-sacrifice (Eph. 5:25), decision making (1 Tim. 2:12) and justice, mercy and humility (Mic. 6:8)—in the home as well as in the assembly. His father should disciple him in Bible teaching, counseling, public prayer, family evangelism, political issues, organization skills and much more.

 

Now if the purpose of all education is to equip us to achieve our God-ordained responsibilities in the world, then what kind of occupation provides a young man the framework for attaining these life functions? To put the question another way, Where does a young man’s career fit into his four God-ordained responsibilities? Is his career equivalent to “bringing dominion over the creation”? And what should guide his career choice?

 

Contrary to most Christians’ lifestyles today, the Scriptures do not view work (i.e., career, job, occupation) as a priority in and of itself but rather as a means and medium for achieving a man’s biblical priorities (life functions). For example, a particular occupation may strengthen his walk with God, provide sufficient income for his family and church, leave enough time (or, ideally, provide the framework) to nurture his family and minister to others, and allow opportunity to govern a particular sphere of God’s creation. But a different occupation might tear down his spiritual life, supply meager funds for family and church, leave inadequate time for family nurturing or ministry, and grant little occasion to “subdue and rule” over some area of God’s creation.

 

So, you see, a man’s work is not a priority at all, but instead, is a help or a hindrance in achieving his biblical priorities. A father ought therefore to choose a vocation for his son that best enables him to carry out his life functions. Though a man’s work should develop and utilize his God-given talents, it should be inclusive, not independent, of his family (Gen. 2:18). Home-schooling families normally recognize the importance of the wife being family-centered; but it’s just as biblical for the father to be family-centered, not career-centered. This is why a home business is generally a young man’s best choice for his occupation. When compared to working for an employer outside the home, a family-centered home business normally gives a man much greater freedom to meet his God-ordered priorities (rather than the boss’s priorities). For this reason, the Apostle Paul urged the Corinthian believers in regard to employment, “if you are able indeed to become free, rather do that” (1 Cor. 7:21). That is, pursue an occupation that gives you the greatest freedom to achieve your God-ordained priorities.

 

Where is a young man’s occupational training to take place? Although a young woman’s schooling is to occur entirely under the safeguard of her father (generally in the vicinity of the family home), a young man’s training location is a wisdom decision (by the father) based on many factors. Though he is to remain under his father’s authority until being released to adulthood (Life Graduation), he may not necessarily remain under his father’s direct oversight for all of his occupational training. In Bible times, a son normally learned the trade of his father (or at least a vocation his father could teach him), just as Jesus learned carpentry from his step-father Joseph and Paul tentmaking from his father.

 

However, it was not uncommon for a young man to be apprenticed in a different trade under a trusted employer. Although young men do not have the same physical and spiritual vulnerabilities as young women, still Solomon warned his son of the risk of bad company, particularly the adulteress and the harlot (Prov. 1-9).

 

So, it seems that the biblical norm (and thus what will most often be wise) is for a young man to complete his life preparation in the family home and under the direct oversight of his father. Even if a father has not yet developed his own home business, perhaps he can help his son start a home business and “learn by doing.” Nevertheless, when a son is to learn an occupation unfamiliar to his father, he may be apprenticed (by an individual or school) under certain conditions.

 

To reach a wise decision concerning apprenticeship, a father must ask a number of important questions. In regard to the son, is he physically and spiritually mature enough for release from parental oversight? Has the son proven himself faithful in small things so that release will not be beyond his moral maturity? Is the father’s spiritual discipleship of his son completed, leaving deep-rooted spiritual habits that will not be compromised under trial? In regard to the circumstances, is the son’s release detrimental to the household (perhaps he is still needed at home)? Does the father know personally and sufficiently the work environment as well as the persons responsible for his son? Are there serious moral or physical risks? How long is the son being released (days only, overnight, weeks, months—the longer the release, the greater the risk)? How far away is the son being released? Is it close enough to know what’s going on and to intervene if necessary? In regard to the opportunity as a whole, is this the option that best fits God’s principles? Has the father sought the counsel of his elders? The answers to these and similar questions will enable a father to make a wise decision regarding apprenticeship for his son.

 

After Life Graduation, a young man has the biblical liberty either to establish his own “household of one” or to remain a contributing member of his father’s house. We see examples in Scripture both ways, though the latter may have been the norm since a Hebrew father’s responsibilities included “instructing his son in the law, teaching him a trade and bringing him into wedlock.” Consequently, Isaac remained in his father’s household until he was 40 years old when Abraham got him a wife. The words “For this cause (marriage) a man shall leave his father and his mother…” (Gen. 2:24) speak certainly not of the only cause, but perhaps the primary cause of a man’s leaving his parental home.

 

Role Of God-Given Gifts, Talents, Interests

 

If our four God-ordained life functions are to guide our educational choices, then what role does a young person’s God-given gifts, talents and interests play? That was our fifth crucial question. Hasn’t God given these gifts to be developed and used for His glory? Indeed, yes, for Paul charged Timothy to “kindle afresh the gift of God which is in you…” (2 Tim. 1:6). But practically speaking, most of us have several gifts, talents and interests, each of which may be developed in a dozen different directions. So, a choice must be made about which talent to develop in which direction; and that choice must be in accord with biblical principles, not in violation of those principles.

 

In practice, then, a father’s career choice for his son (yes, it is ultimately the father’s decision) must be guided by the larger needs of the family, by what would best enable his son to accomplish his life functions, and by the biblically legitimate training options available. If Scriptural principles would be compromised, then a different talent or a different direction should be chosen for a vocation. Though the world literally defines a man by his occupation, biblically a man’s faithfulness to God is far more critical to his success in life. Consequently, we find the most pivotal men in history—Christ and His apostles—in such simple vocations as carpenters, tentmakers and fishermen. And despite God’s supernaturally calling certain persons in the Bible to specific tasks, the idea that God “calls” each Christian to a particular “life work” finds no support in Scripture (see Decision Making and the Will of God, by Garry Friesen.)

 

Likewise, a father’s higher education of his daughter (as is my case) should fit the overall goals of the family, qualify her to carry out her life functions, and avoid all compromising education options. Instead of preparing for a worldly career distinct from her husband’s, a young woman should have one primary application in view in developing her gifts, talents and interests, namely, that of becoming a capable wife and mother. And the father must then find for her a husband to whom her talents correspond—what Genesis 2:18 calls “a corresponding helper,” one who completes him in all of life as the two become one flesh.

 

Secondarily, her higher education ought to equip her to be a contributing member of her father’s household until she marries and, in the event of an untimely death of her husband, a self-supporting widow from within the home. This last eventuality may never be needed, for most widows would be cared for by her husband’s estate, her children or the local church (1 Tim. 5:3-16). But there are cases historically and biblically (e.g., Lydia, Acts 16:14) where women have needed to support themselves. And she would be prepared to do so if she had skills for a business within the home (Tit. 2:5).

 

Some fathers may think we have too narrowly understood a young woman’s education and work. It is not within the scope of this article to argue that point further, but only to refer you to the forthcoming book by Douglas Phillips entitled “God Calls Men To Be Providers” (first published as a series in Quit You Like Men). Other dads may have cautions in the opposite direction, that higher education for a woman leads to pride, discontent, self-sufficiency, worldly temptation and easy divorce. These are legitimate concerns. But couldn’t the same be said of men? A stable marriage is founded not upon a man or a woman’s education level but upon an understanding of their biblical roles and their commitment to God. In fact, a strong case could be made that a marriage is more stable when a woman’s higher education qualifies her to help her husband more ably. Isn’t a woman just as responsible as a man to develop and use (within biblical parameters) her God-given talents to help her husband bring dominion over the creation (Gen. 1:28; Matt. 25:14-30). Douglas Wilson writes in Credenda-Agenda, “A neo-Amish sisterhood is starting to develop in some quarters of the conservative Christian community… [which] disparages the intellectual capacities of women.” Instead, we should view the intellectual capacity of a woman, blended with godly character, as a valued capability to aid her husband and educate her sons who will stand with their father in the gate, contending together with their enemies (Ps. 127:5).

 

In view of our studies to this point, our family concluded that not only Zoie but also her two younger sisters (Cara and Kesed) would pursue gender-specific life skills and spiritual development in keeping with their unique role as women. And in the realms of academics and fine arts, they would develop their talents in music (piano, flute, violin and voice) in hopes of serving a husband who would enjoy and need those abilities in his life and ministry. The critical question now facing us was, How? How to advance their musical talents to full proficiency within the environment of the family home and under the watchful oversight of their father?

 

Post-Secondary Educational Options

 

Zoie and I could now see the finish line before us as we asked the next critical question, How are the adult disciplines best developed during the post-high school years? As we researched this issue, the educational options fell into four categories. A young person’s talents and disciplines could be honed through home business, apprenticeship, trade/technical schools or college programs. After a thorough study of what each option offered in the field of music, Zoie and I concluded that some sort of nontraditional (“at home”) college program (supplemented with home business, apprenticeship and technical training) would best equip her to use her musical gift for serving her future family and church. Thus, we began to probe that option through much reading, many phone calls, personal interviews and visits to college campuses. What we learned was both shocking and inspiring.

 

We were dismayed to discover that many students today flock to college because they have little vision for what else to do with their life. With few exceptions, the remaining students go to college for one of three reasons: (1) to get an education, (2) to get a degree or (3) to “party” (that is, to socialize with peers). Regrettably, the first reason is no longer the foremost reason for an increasing number of these students. That is why many dedicated teachers have become disheartened; and more than a few serious-minded students have sought alternative approaches for their higher education. Here is where our investigation became deeply encouraging.

 

Before the mid-1970s, a student seeking a nontraditional, “off-campus” college education had exactly two choices: the University of London and the University of South Africa. Since then, however, there has been a virtual explosion of college-level correspondence courses, guided independent study and accredited “external degree programs.” In fact, we learned that more than 400 accredited colleges in the United States now offer “nontraditional” degree programs; and over 100 such schools grant fully accredited bachelor’s, master’s and/or doctor’s degrees entirely, or almost entirely, through non-residential study, which are well recognized in the academic, professional and business communities. Included in those numbers are more than 20 Christian liberal arts and Bible colleges that offer many educational programs from a distinctively Christian world view.

 

As Zoie and I poured over various college guides and course catalogs, we began to see how all of the “general education” requirements (English, history, math, science, etc.) for a Bachelor’s degree in music (or any other major) could be acquired through accredited correspondence courses from various Christian colleges. And the “hands on” music requirements of keyboard, voice and ear training could be obtained through “portfolio credit” with carefully chosen (and supervised) local instructors and apprenticeship programs. The remaining music credits in music history, theory and composition were found to be available from a music institute (a technical school) with no humanistic ax to grind. This became the course of college study that our family chose for five major reasons (which apply to young men as well as young women). Any one of these reasons could easily be expanded to many pages—in fact, there are whole books written on several of these issues. But to preserve your patience, let me try to be concise.

 

If the primary purpose of college is educational, then something is amiss in the classroom. Simply put, research has shown that, for most subjects, tutorial instruction and guided independent study give superior results over classroom teaching. For example, in one study correspondence students consistently outperformed their classroom counterparts by more than ten percentage points on the final exam. The non-classroom approach is also more flexible, allowing the student to use books, audio, video, and computer networks to study at his own pace (intensively, if he chooses), in his own home, according to his preferred schedule, even while traveling. With such flexibility, our goal is that each of our children complete their bachelor’s degree in three years or less (and a master’s degree, too, if needed), yet without sacrificing our moral, family or financial integrity. Yes, such a course of study demands greater self-discipline and personal scheduling; but, in our judgment, it better prepares the student to be a self-starter, leader and entrepreneur in later life.

 

A second rationale for favoring an off-campus education is moral. What conditions best enable my post-high school children to continue the pursuit of godliness as they complete their education? Although we do not seek to live in a vacuum, we believe it both wise and biblical to guard against negative influences upon our lives (this is insulation, not isolation). The average residential college thrusts very impressionable youths under the persuasion of typically liberal professors and libertine students. Confused minds and compromised morals are nearly guaranteed! But by cautiously selecting our tutors and courses, we can maintain, to a very high degree, an education from a Christian world view. And by choosing off-campus studies, we avoid the immoral peer influence which pervades the typical college campus, even to the point of serious physical and moral harm. What should we expect when youth with raging hormones are told they are nothing but evolved animals? Crime statistics reveal that the average college campus is now more dangerous than New York’s Central Park! How much wiser, we think, to study under the care and protection of godly parents.

 

The third convincing reason for selecting non-residential study is family. Frankly, we enjoy one another’s company in our family; we delight in each other’s educational experiences. That is why we have pursued home business and home schooling for the past 11 years. Moreover, since the parents’ task involves preparing their children to be well-educated, self-supporting, highly capable mates and parents-to-be, we believe the parents’ role has seldom been completed when their children reach age 17 or 18. In short, we have more parenting to do; and we do not believe it either wise or biblical to delegate this responsibility to an alma mater (literally, a “foster mother”). In a personal letter, Phil Lancaster of Patriarch magazine concurs: “Family is not just a launching pad for independent individuals, it is the context in which every person is meant to live out their earthly existence. We must get over this mindset that children grow up and ‘leave the nest’ (prior to marriage).”

 

I don’t wish to be mundane, but our fourth motive for adopting an external degree program is financial. Economically, an off-campus education is simply better stewardship of our limited resources. Whereas a four-year degree will average about $80,000 at a private university and $40,000 at a state school, it will run less than $20,000 at home—even as little as $12,000 for some programs (including correspondence courses, tutoring charges and even room & board payment to parents). Furthermore, the student can usually earn more at home through a more flexible work/study schedule. In our case, our children earn profit sharing through our family bakery business as well as conduct their own music studio (which also provides field experience for their course work). Admittedly, the above comparison does not take into account the fact that scholarship aid is much more readily available to on-campus students. However, since most of such aid comes from tax dollars or inflated tuition fees (all taken without the giver’s consent), we prefer to pay our own way (or seek truly philanthropic aid) rather than fleece our neighbor or encourage socialism.

 

Applying Our Home-School Convictions To Post-High School Training

 

The fifth, final and foremost cause for our deciding on college at home is spiritual. The first four reasons—educational flexibility, healthy moral development, closer family relationships and better financial stewardship—could be asserted as well by a non-Christian. Make no mistake, they are significant reasons; but at best they make college at home a wise decision, a preferred choice. It is the fifth cause, the spiritual reason, that, for our family, moves this decision from preference to conviction—that is, something required of us by God. This seventh and final question was the very heartbeat of our research, namely, How do our home-school convictions apply to post-high school training? Other sincere Christians may not assess this issue quite as we do, and we do not make this a test of fellowship with them. But see if this makes sense to you.

 

Our family had already come to the conviction that God’s purpose for our children’s higher education was to bring glory to Himself by training them in their four God-ordained life functions (relationship to God, family, church and world) until they are fully prepared for adulthood, marriage and establishing a new household. We were also convicted that a God-pleasing education for our daughters must be very gender-specific (focused upon becoming a wife, mother and homeworker) and must occur entirely under the loving oversight of their father. If we had sons, we concluded, their education also would be very gender-specific (husband, father and family-centered vocation) and would occur under their father’s oversight or in a morally safe environment.

 

Now, the critical issue is this: Does a traditional, residential college education bring glory to God? To answer that question, let’s test the on-campus approach by the three components of a God-honoring education: the content, the teacher and the instructional setting.

 

First, the content of a God-honoring education must be truth (Ps. 25:10; 119:163), more specifically, truth which prepares our children to accomplish their gender-specific, God-ordained functions in the world. Since a secular education leaves God out, it cannot adhere to a Christian world view and will consequently misunderstand, misinterpret and misapply knowledge (Jn. 17:17, Col. 2:3). Even the best Christian colleges today, though teaching basic Christian content, have adopted secular goals for their students, encouraging both young men and young women to be career-centered rather than family-centered, preparing women to be like men, and through women professors, displaying wrong role models for our daughters. Is that the target toward which you are aiming your young arrows? Does a traditional, residential college education (even a Christian college) pass the test of content?

 

Second, the teachers of a God-honoring education must be, for the most part, the parents (Deut. 6:1-9; Ps. 78:1-8; Prov. 6:20). This is so because all teaching conveys values; the student will not merely think like his teacher, he will become like his teacher (Luke 6:40; Jer. 10:2). Consequently, God instructs the father (with his wife as helper) to be the primary teacher of his children. This is simply a proper emulation of our Heavenly Father’s relationship to His own Son: “… the Son can do nothing of Himself, unless it is something He sees the Father doing; for whatever the Father does, these things the Son also does in like manner. For the Father loves the Son, and shows Him all things that He Himself is doing” (Jn. 5:19-20). A Scriptural view of education (Father-Son, parent-child, shepherd-saint, etc.) is predicated upon an essential, irreplaceable heart-bond of love, “turning the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers” (Mal. 4:6; Lk. 1:17). Biblical teaching is not the sterile transfer of ideas from one brain to another, but rather a discipleship relationship. Do we love our children enough to remain their primary teachers (disciplers) until they are fully prepared for adulthood, marriage and establishing a new household?

 

At the college level, parents may be greatly aided in this responsibility by correspondence courses, preferably from Christian colleges (just as textbooks are utilized in the earlier years). Yet, when a parent is genuinely unable to teach a particular subject or skill, he may delegate that particular task to a tutor who will instill the father’s biblical values and submit to the father’s will. Parents teaching their own children until marriage was the norm for Scripturally obedient parents in Bible times; any biblical examples to the contrary were the exceptions, not the rule. Even the exceptions were trusted friends, not unknown faculty (even Christian) who will not faithfully uphold your values. Does a traditional, residential college education pass the test of the teacher?

 

Third, the instructional setting of a God-honoring education must normally be the Christian home and family. We parents are often pridefully self-deceived in thinking our children (and ourselves) to be spiritually invulnerable to tempting circumstances. That is why the Apostle Paul begins his warning in 1 Cor. 15:33 with the words, “Do not be deceived…” (because we are likely to be self-deceived). His warning then follows, “Bad company corrupts good character” (see also Prov. 13:20; Jer. 10:2; 1 Cor. 14:20). Young men and women should not be molded by the sinful and destructive values, attitudes, philosophies, vocabularies, behaviors and lifestyles of their peers. Nor by the “politically correct” teaching of secular (and sometimes Christian) professors. Yet that is precisely what occurs in the typical college classroom and on the typical college campus (yes, even Christian campuses— I was there!). The age-segregated, co-ed classroom by its very structure promotes wrong male/female relationships and women learning to compete with men (rather than becoming helpers). By way of contrast, the Christian home remains a warm, nurturing, protective environment where studious young men and women can grow “wise in what is good [yet remain] innocent in what is evil” (Rom. 16:19b). Does a traditional, residential college education pass the test of the instructional setting?

 

Pass or fail? How does the traditional (including Christian) college measure up in God’s grade book? Does it bring Him glory in its content, teachers and classrooms? Our family has concluded that, if we were to choose an on-campus education for our children (even if we had sons), we could not adequately oversee the subject matter, the tutors or the social/moral environment. In our view, we would be abdicating our responsibility as parents. To ask us to choose the traditional college program for our children would be the moral equivalent of asking a Jew to eat pork. It would compromise our convictions. We could not do it and be true to our God. Yes, that sounds rather narrow in today’s culture. The world urges us to give our children a “broad” education, but God says “broad is the way that leads to destruction” (Matt. 7:13). Instead, Proverbs 22:6 says to narrow (the literal meaning of “train up”) a child in the way he should go—keep him within the biblical parameters which God has set up for his moral and physical protection.

 

In discussing this topic with several esteemed Christian brothers, a few additional concerns were raised by them. For example, What young man or woman newly off to college has not experienced the deep pangs of loneliness? Is this not a trap for falling into immorality which marriage obviously avoids: “For this cause—marriage—a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall cleave to his wife…” (Gen. 2:24)? Is not the modern college environment a clear violation of God’s principle to “make no provision for the flesh in regard to its desires” (Rom. 13:14)? College has become the principle context for choosing a life occupation and a life partner. Shouldn’t godly parents be directing both of these critical decisions? And what about the problem of an “unequal yoke” in the spiritual training of our children (2 Cor. 6:14ff)? Is this not a forbidden alliance with known enemies of truth and godliness? It seems that nearly every element of the college experience is a violation of some biblical principle!

 

Your Own Application

 

That is our conviction, developed from personal study of the Bible because God wants us to walk by conviction, not by convenience, seeking first His kingdom and His righteousness (Matt. 6:33), not being lukewarm about this matter or any other (Rev. 3:16). What is your conviction from the Bible on this crucial matter? What is God’s life goal for your children? Is it for them to glorify God (1) by being properly related to Him through salvation and spiritual growth, (2) by becoming accomplished and devoted in their role responsibilities as a husband/father or wife/mother, (3) by being a dedicated, active member of a local body of believers and (4) by bringing dominion over the creation (with their mate) by developing their God-given abilities? Are humanistic courses, liberal professors and immoral classmates God’s means to God’s goal for your children? (As described above, even Christian colleges have similar problems.) The question is NOT should we ever study secular materials (then even reading the newspaper would be immoral). The question is WHERE, WHEN and HOW shall we maintain truth and purity without compromise in an ongoing program of self-education. The answer is, in my judgment, seldom in the college classroom.

 

Your reply may be, “But my son is spiritually mature, readily able to discern truth from error, and strong enough to resist temptation from peers.” Jonathan Lindvall in his lecture on “Homeschooling College” observes that liberal professors (as well as homosexuals, abortionists, feminists, environmentalists, evolutionists, humanists, cults, Satan worshipers, etc.) ply their trade on college campuses expressly because they know just how impressionable the students are. Because God designed our children to still be moldable at this age, many Christian students have lost their faith (and morality) on the college campus. Is it possible that you might be over estimating your child’s maturity?

 

However, if your appraisal is truly accurate, and not just parental pride (ask your church elders); and if there is no safer, wiser option for developing his God-given abilities (there generally are several talents to choose from for a life occupation, not just one); and if in your conscience you are not compromising any biblical principle; then perhaps a college classroom would be a legitimate alternative—maybe. Still, there are several options to prayerfully consider which I list below from poorest choice to poor choice:

 

(1) Attending secular college, living on campus. (Clearly the worst possible choice.)

(2) Attending Christian college, living on campus. (Sadly, not much better.)

(3) Attending secular college, living at home (or possibly with a trusted Christian adult).

(4) Attending Christian college, living at home (or possibly with a trusted Christian adult).

 

I hesitate even to list the above choices, believing they are nearly always poor choices, just some worse than others. They are all fraught with moral risk that may lead to disaster. If “college at home” will not achieve your occupational goal, why not just choose a different occupation? After all, a Christian’s occupation is not an end in itself but simply a means and medium for achieving his biblical priorities.

 

Do these principles and concerns apply to releasing our children to situations other than college, such as apprenticeships, jobs or ministries away from home. Of course, they do—perhaps even more so! First, test each training opportunity by the above tests: (1) Does it teach truthful content which prepares our children for their gender-specific, God-ordained functions in the world? (2) Do its teachers supplant what the parents should be doing, or fail to uphold parental values? (3) Is its social/moral environment “bad company” or promoting wrong relationships? Even then, don’t be too quick to give approval. In order to make a wise decision, you must have an adequate understanding of both your child as well as the new circumstances. Has your child developed deeply-rooted spiritual habits? Does he seek the company of those who are wise, not foolish peers? Do you know personally and sufficiently the environment and the persons responsible for your child? Have you received positive recommendations from other trusted Christians familiar with the circumstances? How long and how far away is your child being released? Have you investigated all of God’s principles related to this release? Have you sought counsel from your elders?

 

One regretful parent writes: “What we thought was a fine college ruined our daughter. A course in religion destroyed her faith in the Bible, a course in philosophy destroyed her faith in God, a course in psychology destroyed her faith in her parents, a course in biology destroyed her faith in the divine creation, and a course in political science destroyed her faith in the American way of life.” It may be natural for some birds (and students) to migrate, but not so for all of them. Those who find it “natural” are pursuing what stimulates their nature. Christians, however, have a new, redeemed nature which is not properly stimulated by the compromised values of the college campus (even the Christian college campus). Thus, these birds of a feather should flock together in the nurturing family that God gave them—at least until one of the brood builds a new nest with her mate.

 

Often Christian parents recognize the college option to be a compromise, but they see no other choice for training their sons and daughters. They understand what to “put off” but not what to “put on” in its place. Consequently, I am developing a step-by-step booklet to supplement this article. In it I will take you through the process of evaluating your children’s life goals, choosing a vocation that best enables them to accomplish their God-ordered priorities, deciding what sort of training is necessary for their chosen vocation (home business, apprenticeship, trade/technical courses, college by correspondence, etc.), and how to find that training without compromising your convictions. [NOTE: Patriarch Toolbox will carry this booklet when it becomes available.] In essence, I have simply documented our own family’s journey along the same path. And the training we found available has been wonderfully encouraging. That encouragement is contagious—please let us share it with you!

 

In closing, let me admit that this article is incomplete (I haven’t yet dealt with the “hard cases”) and imperfect (no man is without error). Trailblazing cuts a rather rough road initially just to get a pathway through new terrain. Consequently, the path that we are traveling will need more smoothing by others. So we welcome your kindly input just as Priscilla and Aquila “explained to Apollos the way of God more accurately” (Acts 18:26).

 

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John Thompson is the director of Family Shepherd Ministries and a Bible teacher at Walpole Christian Assembly in Walpole, New Hampshire. John welcomes your comments and contacts. His address is 651-B Valley Road, Walpole, NH 03608. Email: JohnThompson@consultant.com.

 

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Will You Be In Hell?

Have you ever thought about this question: “Will you be in Hell”?

 

Q. What kind of question is that? Hell isn’t real, is it?

 

A. Yes, the Bible, God’s own Word, discusses Hell and God’s judgment from beginning to end. In fact, the Bible tells us that most people are headed there.

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

“The wicked shall be turned into Hell, and all the nations that forget God. [Psalm 9:17]
 

Jesus said: “And fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear him which is able to destroy both soul and body in Hell.” [Matthew 10:28]

 

Q. You mean Jesus taught about Hell?

 

A. Yes. Jesus (God in the flesh) taught more about Hell than any other person quoted in the Bible.

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

“But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of Hell fire.” [Matthew 5:22]
 

“And in Hell he lift up his eyes, being in torments” [Luke 16:23]

 

Q. What is Hell like?

 

A. Hell is being under God’s anger for our sin, and, eternally, will be more horrible than one can imagine.

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

1. A place of eternal torment:
 

“There shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth” [Luke 13:28]
 

“And they gnawed their tongues for pain” [Revelation 16:10]
 

“And the smoke of their torment ascendeth up for ever and ever: and they have no rest day nor night” [Revelation 14:11]
 

2. A place of darkness:
 

“A land of darkness, as darkness itself; and of the shadow of death, without any order, and where the light is as darkness.” [Job 10:22]
 

“Then said the King to the servants, Bind him hand and foot, and take him away, and cast him into outer darkness” [Matthew 22:13]
 

3. A place of fire:
 

“For a fire is kindled in mine anger, and shall burn unto the lowest Hell” [Deuteronomy 32:22]
 

“And whosoever was not found written in the book of life was cast into the lake of fire.” [Revelation 20:15]

 

Q. Why should a loving God create a Hell? Isn’t God all merciful and forgiving of man’s weaknesses and failings?

 

A. Although God is love and has mercy, God is also just and righteous.

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

“Thou art of purer eyes than to behold evil, and canst not look on iniquity” [Habakkuk 1:13]
 

[concerning the Lord] …”and by no means clearing the guilty” [Numbers 14:18]
 

“For such an high priest became us, who is holy, harmless, undefiled, separate from sinners” [Hebrews 7:26]
 

“Howbeit thou art just in all that is brought upon us; for thou hast done right, but we have done wickedly.” [Nehemiah 9:33]

 

Q. Aren’t you just trying to scare people?

 

A. Yes indeed; the Bible, God’s word, is frightening in many, many places, and teaches that only those who fear God, and are humbled by God, can be saved from everlasting Hell.

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

“The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge” [Proverbs 1:7]
 

“…but to this man will I look, even to him that is poor and of a contrite spirit, and trembleth at my word.” [Isaiah 66:2]
 

“Knowing therefore the terror of the Lord” [2 Corinthians 5:11]
 

“Vengeance belongeth unto me, I will recompense, saith the Lord. And again, The Lord shall judge his people. It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.” [Hebrews 10:30, 31]
 

“And He humbled you and allowed you to hunger, and then He fed you with manna, which you did not know, neither did your fathers know it, so that He might make you know that man shall not live by bread alone. But every word that comes out of the mouth of the LORD man shall live.” [Deuteronomy 8:3]

 

Q. When God made Adam and Eve, the first man and woman, He commanded them not to eat of one tree in the Garden of Eden. He told them that if they did, they would die. They were tempted by Satan, the Devil, and did disobey and ate of the fruit of that tree. Did they actually die?

 

A. Yes, they began to die physically, and immediately died spiritually and morally, and, unless saved, would die the “second death” (eternal damnation) on Judgment Day.

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

“Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned” [Romans 5:12]
 

“It is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment.” [Hebrews 9:27]
 

“And you hath he quickened, who were dead in trespasses and sins.” [Ephesians 2:1]
 

“Death and Hell were cast into the lake of fire. This is the second death.” [Revelation 20:14]

 

Q. Suppose I am a sinner, but everybody else is, too; and I’ve done a lot of good things in my life. Won’t my good deeds balance out my bad behavior, errors and the mistakes I have made?

 

A. Not one bit. Our problem with God is not just “bad behavior, errors or mistakes”. All men have broken God’s law repeatedly, and all men are sinners and no good deed that they do can impress God; in fact, even the good deeds we do are actually seen as disobedience (self-righteousness)by God.

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

1. All people are sinners:
 

“There is none righteous, no, not one… there is none that doeth good, no, not one… There is no fear of God before their eyes… For all have sinned.” [Romans 3:10-23]
 
2. Not only do men commit some sins, they are considered utterly wicked by God:
 

“The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?” [Jeremiah 17:9]
 

3. God’s says that breaking one of God’s laws means we’ve broken the whole Law.
 

“For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all.” [James 2:10]
 

4. All men are sinners from the moment of their conception:
 

“Behold, I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me.” [Psalm 51:5]
 

5. Our good works are considered wicked by God:
 

“But we are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags” [Isaiah 64:6]
 

6. When the first man Adam sinned, the entire human race was plunged into sin because he represented the whole human race:
 

“For as in Adam all die” [1 Corinthians 15:22]
 

7. All men love their sin:
 

“And this is the condemnation, that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil.” [John 3:19]
 

8. All mankind suffers from three sorts of sins:
 

“the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.” [1 John 2:16]
 

(in other words: sexual immorality, love of this world’s possessions and self-centeredness)
 

9. Just as bad as sexual immorality is spiritual adultery or constant unfaithfulness to God our Maker:
 

“… for thou hast gone a whoring from thy God.”  [Hosea 9:1]

 

Q. How can God be just and send all sinners to Hell forever? Some men have never seen a Bible, nor heard about Jesus.

 

A. God says we are without excuse.

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

“Because that which may be known of God is manifest in them; for God hath shewed it unto them. For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse.” [Romans 1:19, 20]
 

Not only so, but Romans chapter 1 continues (beginning in verse 21) to describe sins that have infected the whole human race:
 

Ungratefulness to God • Worshipping and making idols of created things rather than the One Who created them • Homosexuality • Adultery and fornication (sexual intimacy outside marriage) • Distorting God’s truth into a lie • Wickedness: disobeying the Bible • Desiring another’s goods • Evil intentions • Envy (jealousy) • Lying (deceitfulness) • Murder (including hatred of others) • Contradicting or ignoring God’s word, the Bible • Depravity • Gossiping • Slandering • Hating God • Spitefulness • Pride • Boasting • Corrupt thoughts • Disobedience to parents • Breaking promises • Loving persons and things we should not • Unwillingness to receive God’s counsel • Showing no compassion for others.

 

Q. What can I do to avoid going to Hell forever?

 

A. Nothing whatsoever, but God has, in His great mercy and grace, decided to save some from the lost human race, and to take them to be with Him forever in Heaven.

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

“Thou shalt call his name JESUS: for he shall save his people from their sins.” [Matthew 1:21]
 

“I am the good shepherd: the good shepherd giveth his life for the sheep.” [John 10:11]
 

“According as he hath chosen us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before him in love: Having predestinated us unto the adoption of children by Jesus Christ to himself, according to the good pleasure of his will.” [Ephesians 1:4, 5]

 

Q. Now wait just a minute, if God has decided all this already, there’s no point in my getting all upset about going to Hell forever. There’s nothing I can do about it — it’s all decided.

 

A. No one knows whom God has chosen. If you do not fear God, do not plead with Him to save you; you are simply proving that it is unlikely you are one of God’s elect.

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

“Therefore hath he mercy on whom he will have mercy, and whom he will he hardeneth. Thou wilt say then unto me, Why doth he yet find fault? For who hath resisted his will? Nay but, O man, who art thou that repliest against God? Shall the thing formed say to him that formed it, Why hast thou made me thus? Hath not the potter power over the clay, of the same lump to make one vessel unto honour, and another unto dishonour? What if God, willing to shew his wrath, and to make his power known, endured with much longsuffering the vessels of wrath fitted to destruction: And that he might make known the riches of his glory on the vessels of mercy, which he had afore prepared unto glory.” [Romans 9:18-23]

 

Q. Doesn’t the Bible say “Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved”? Can I simply believe on Jesus as my personal Savior, choose Christ, decide to follow Jesus?

 

A. No. There’s not a word in the Bible about accepting Jesus or choosing Jesus. In the Bible God gives many commands to men like: believe, repent or be perfect: commands that man is utterly incapable of obeying in and of himself.

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

“Be ye therefore perfect” [Matthew 5:48]
 

“Repent ye: for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand.” [Matthew 3:2]

 

Q. Then no one can be saved, isn’t that what you’re really saying?

 

A. No.

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

“And he said, The things which are impossible with men are possible with God.” [Luke 18:27]
 

“That which is highly esteemed among men is abomination in the sight of God.” [Luke 16:15]
 

Men have invented their own salvation system — in it, they choose God, He does not choose them. It’s a game of Let’s make a deal with God, a 50-50 deal, it’s a Do it yourself salvation. Men want to be God; they insist on making the ultimate decision. They want to accept Jesus as their Savior, they want the make or break decision — they will be the kingmaker. Men want only to trust in themselves to save themselves, to make the final decision. Appearing to seek salvation, mankind has invented a very wicked, totally man-centered, self-centered false gospel of salvation.

 

Q. Can’t I just have faith in Jesus Christ, and be saved?

 

A. No, even the devils profess He is the Savior. The only faith that can save one from sin and Hell is Christ’s own faith — His personal property, His personal possession.

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

“Knowing that a man is not justified by the works of the law, but by the faith of Jesus Christ, even we have believed in Jesus Christ, that we might be justified by the faith of Christ, and not by the works of the law: for by the works of the law shall no flesh be justified…I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.” [Galatians 2:16, 20]
 

“And be found in him, not having mine own righteousness, which is of the law, but that which is through the faith of Christ, the righteousness which is of God by faith.” [Philippians 3:9]
 

“For as many as are of the works of the law are under the curse: as it is written, Cursed is every one that continueth not in all things which are written in the book of the law to do them.” [Galatians 3:10]
 

“Christ hath redeemed us from the curse of the law, being made a curse for us: for it is written, Cursed is every one that hangeth on a tree: That the blessing of Abraham might come on the Gentiles through Jesus Christ; that we might receive the promise of the Spirit through faith.” [Galatians 3:13, 14]
 

“And this is the promise that he hath promised us, even eternal life.” 1 John 2:25
 

The promise of eternal life (salvation) for His people was established in two ways:
 

1) By Christ becoming sin (2 Co. 5:21) for every Christian and then suffering the punishment of eternal Hell as their substitute. In fact, God the Father had promised God the Son that His (Christ’s) soul would not be left in Hell.
 

“He [David] seeing this before spake of the resurrection of Christ, that his soul was not left in hell, neither his flesh did see corruption.” Acts 2:31 (See also Psalm 16:10.)
 

2) By Christ’s perfect obedience in thought, word and deed (Psalm 40:7, 8), Christ fulfilled all the Scripture; and thus He is able to transfer His Righteousness (goodness) to every Believer.
 

“For as by one man’s disobedience many were made sinners, so by the obedience of one shall many be made righteous.” [Romans 5:19]
 

As a gift, Christ gives His own faith to those whom He came to save,
 

“For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God” [Ephesians 2:8]

 

Q. Would joining a Christian church and being baptized in water insure my salvation?

 

A. Absolutely not. These things cannot insure one’s salvation from eternal Hell, nor can they enhance one’s salvation, once God has actually saved someone.

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

“Howbeit in vain do they worship me, teaching for doctrines the commandments of men.” [Mark 7:7]
 

Whenever possible, a true Christian will join only a church that faithfully teaches all of the Bible, and only the Bible. Whenever possible, he will be baptized in water as an outward sign that God has already done something to him, saved him — giving him a new birth through the life-giving sacrifice of Jesus, the Son of God.

 

Q. Many people today talk about supernatural healing and miracles, and special heavenly speech called speaking in tongues, do I need to experience these things?

 

A. Not a bit; these are signs of a false gospel and a great delusion. God gave all supernatural healing, miracles, signs (like tongues) and wonders during Bible times, to prove that those who were speaking for God were precisely from God. 

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

“God… spake in time past unto the fathers by the prophets, Hath in these last days spoken unto us by his Son” [Hebrews 1:1, 2]
 

“How shall we escape, if we neglect so great salvation; which at the first began to be spoken by the Lord, and was confirmed unto us by them that heard him; God also bearing them witness, both with signs and wonders, and with divers miracles, and gifts of the Holy Ghost, according to his own will?” [Hebrews 2:3, 4]
 

“Truly the signs of an apostle were wrought among you in all patience, in signs, and wonders, and mighty deeds.” [2 Corinthians 12:12]
 

“Jesus of Nazareth, a man approved of God among you by miracles and wonders and signs, which God did by him in the midst of you” [Acts 2:22]
 

When God finished writing the Bible, He withdrew these supernatural signs; those who claim to practice them are called false Christs and false prophets in the Bible.
 

“If any man shall add unto these things, God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in this book: And if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part out of the book of life, and out of the holy city, and from the things which are written in this book.” [Revelation 22:18, 19]
 

“There shall arise false Christs, and false prophets, and shall shew great signs and wonders; insomuch that, if it were possible, they shall deceive the very elect.” [Matthew 24:24]

 

Q. How can Jesus Christ be the only Savior from sin?

 

A. He was sinless and God from Heaven, and fully a man at the same time.

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

“And I saw, and bare record that this is the Son of God.” [John 1:34]
 

“Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under Heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.” [Acts 4:12]
 

“For there is one God, and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus.” [1 Timothy 2:5]
 

And the Lord Jesus Christ is coming soon to judge the whole earth.
 

“…when the Lord Jesus shall be revealed from Heaven with his mighty angels, In flaming fire taking vengeance on them that know not God, and that obey not the Gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ: Who shall be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord” [2 Thessalonians 1:7-9]

 

Q. Can I still beg God to save me from my sin and from eternal Hell?

 

A. Yes, indeed.

 

Let the Scriptures speak:

 

“All that the Father giveth me [Jesus] shall come to me; and him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out. No man can come to me, except the Father which hath sent me draw him: and I will raise him up at the last day.” [John 6:37, 44]
 

“And the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto Heaven, but smote upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner.” [Luke 18:13]

 

So will YOU be in Hell?

 

This tract produced by “Encounter With Christ”, ewc@osu.edu

 
SEE ALSO: Does God Love You?

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Where Do We Go From Here?

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Where Are You Going?

By I.C. Herendeen

TIME FLIES. The days, the weeks, the months and the years slip by with incredible speed, and are gone before we realize it. It seems as though they no more begin, than they are gone, passed into eternity. So, too, the happenings of the day soon recede into the distant past. Everything in this world is fleeting and transitory — nothing is stable and lasting. “We spend our years as a tale that is told (Psa 90:9). Being busily engrossed with the occupations, labors and pursuits of life we are more or less insensible to the swiftness of passing time, of the solemn fact that life itself is fast getting away from us, and that the end of our earthly journey is speedily and surely approaching. Or, if we are conscious that our time is getting short, either we dismiss the thought or reckon that somehow or other all will be well in the end.
 
How important it is that we keep in mind that our death is ever on the horizon, that we are but a heartbeat from it, and that when we die, we will be ushered into eternity from which there is no return or escape. Since death is so common we do not give this sufficient thought. We seem to have developed a sense of immunity to such an experience. Because death seems so vague, unreal and unlikely, we fail to take it into serious consideration. Instead, we live as though we were certain of many more years of life, whereas God’s Word faithfully warns us: “Boast not thyself of to morrow; for thou knowest not what a day may bring forth” (Prov 27:1).
 
We hear and read of large numbers being killed in war or by accident, of thousands starving to death in Africa and India. But we give this little or no thought; it doesn’t mean much to us since we are not personally involved. A neighbor down the street dies, or one of our own dear ones is taken from us. This may cause us to stop and think for a moment, but soon it is largely gone from our memory and we go on our way day after day, probably with the thought in the back of our mind that we are safe and have no reason to be apprehensive. We have plenty of time yet.
 
Likely the thought of our death would take on a new and serious meaning if we knew that the moment we pass from this scene (and this could be and maybe before this day is over) we would awake in hell, in the “everlasting burnings” (Isa 33:14) forever past all hope. But this is just what God’s Word makes known to every unsaved sinner. Scripture is clear and plain that “the wicked shall be turned into hell!” (Psalm 9:17); “the rich man also died, and was buried, and in hell he lift up his eyes, being in torments” (Luke 16:22).
 
Many take thought for their bodies, but totally neglect the interests of their immortal souls. But “what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? Or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?” (Mark 8:36-37). Most drift aimlessly through life without any care or concern as to what is before them after this fleeting life is over, seemingly taking it for granted that somehow or other everything will turn out all right with them in the end. This is what they hope; and they give themselves the benefit of any doubt.
 
Many have no consciousness of their lost condition. While they do not consider themselves perfect, yet they are not aware that there is anything seriously wrong with them. They are respectable, law-abiding citizens, and consider themselves no worse than their neighbors; and though they scarcely ever read the Bible or enter a church, they fully expect to go to heaven when they die. Some will admit that they are sinners, but imagine that their good works will far outnumber their bad ones. Some fancy that all will be well with them because they have joined “the church of their choice,” been baptized and partake of the Lord’s supper. On the contrary, God’s Word informs us that it is “not by works of righteousness which we have done” (Titus 3:5) that we are saved. Again, we are told that “there is none good but one, that is, God” (Matt 19:17); that “all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God” (Rom 3:23), and that “the wrath of God abideth” (John 3:36) on such. This is the condition of every unsaved sinner in the sight of God–be he king or beggar, high or low, rich or poor, moral or immoral, kind or unkind, religious or irreligious.
 
How prone is human nature to neglect or slight God’s solemn warnings and threats of coming judgment! We are told after death is the judgment (Heb 9:27). The reason is the apprehension of these things is disquieting and disturbing, hence men put such thoughts from them and go on their way. Few indeed are disturbed enough about their eternal future to cry out–What must I do to be saved?” (Acts 16:30). 0h the consummate folly of such indifference and procrastination when your eternal destiny is at stake!
 
Soon, very soon, taking the longest possible view, you will go down to the dust and your spirit will return to God who gave it (EccI 12:7). 0h my friend, do not lightly dismiss this matter from your thoughts, or your folly will only accentuate your misery in that Day. Far better to be made humble now for a time than that you should weep and gnash your teeth (Matt 8:12) forever. His gracious word to you is that God hath no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but that he turn from his wicked way and live (Ezek 33:11); that you repent and turn from all your transgressions: so iniquity shall not be your ruin (Ezek 18:30). Unless you savingly believe the gospel repenting of your sin (Mark 1:15), Christ Himself asks, “How can ye escape the damnation of hell?” (Matt 23:33).
 
Oh sinner, will you continue another day with God’s wrath hanging over your head? Remember, your day of grace may be all but over. God warns you — ”My Spirit shall not always strive with man’ (Gen 6:3). Take heed to His divine admonition “Seek ye the LORD while He may be found; call ye upon Him while He is near: let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts; and let him return unto the LORD, and He will have mercy upon him; and to our God, for He will abundantly pardon” (Isa 55:6-7). Hallelujah, what a Saviour! Flee to Him now by faith while time and opportunity are yours. Cast yourself humbly and penitently at His feet and cry unto Him for mercy, for “Whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved” (Rom 10:13).
 
Christ receives sinners. Will you come? “Behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation” (2 Cor 6:2). “Blessed are all they that put their trust in Him” (Psalm 2:12).  — I.C. Herendeen 

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